Hannah Wells has finally found someone who turns her on. But while she might be confident in every other area of her life, she’s carting around a full set of baggage when it comes to sex and seduction. If she wants to get her crush’s attention, she’ll have to step out of her comfort zone and make him take notice…even if it means tutoring the annoying, childish, cocky captain of the hockey team in exchange for a pretend date.
...and it’s going to be oh so good.
All Garrett Graham has ever wanted is to play professional hockey after graduation, but his plummeting GPA is threatening everything he’s worked so hard for. If helping a sarcastic brunette make another guy jealous will help him secure his position on the team, he’s all for it. But when one unexpected kiss leads to the wildest sex of both their lives, it doesn’t take long for Garrett to realize that pretend isn’t going to cut it. Now he just has to convince Hannah that the man she wants looks a lot like him. @goodreads
I freaking love hockey, well I did, I haven't gotten to watch it in years because all of my yelling at the tv causes my panic attacks to emerge! Damn it! ANYWAY.... I'm trying to decide if this review is going to be just full of excerpts because I have highlighted half the damn book and I don't know what to do...LOL, I'm at a loss. I found this book to be funny as hell and sweet and oh the moments of wanting to Hulk Smash a few people. Let me just put this spoiler thing up here before I even start because with my rambling and the excerpts it's probably a safe bet to have it there!
1. I thought Garrett was going to be a jerk, but mostly he's not.
2. I love Hannah because she's smart and funny as hell.
3. I want to kill the boy that raped Hannah when she was a teen.
4. There are a few ew moments in the book with the sex.
5. The graphic sex didn't start until over half the book, which is good, it's not all about sex.
6. All of the characters are likable but a couple.
So Hannah and Garrett are in college and I'm guessing since half of everyone that has read this book knows he is a hockey player and she is a musician. Hannah is swooning over some dude in the beginning in the book until Garret inserts himself into her life for tutoring. Let's add a few excerpts.
Him: How bout tmrw night? I'm free at night.
Me: Can't. I have the Spanish Flu. Highly contagious. I just saved your life, dude.
Him: Aw, I appreciate the concern. But I'm immune to pandemics that wiped out 40-mil ppl from 1918 to 1919.
Me: How is it u know so much about pandemics?
Him: I'm a history major, baby. I know tons of useless facts.
Ugh, again with the baby thing? All righty. Clearly it's time to put an end to this before he gets his flirt on.
Me: Well, nice chatting with u. Good luck on the makeup exam.
When several seconds tick by and Garrett doesn't respond, I give myself a mental pat on the back for successfully getting rid of him.
I'm about to walk out the door when a picture message meows out of my phone. Against my better judgement, I click to download it, and a moment later, a bare chest fills my screen. Yep. I'm talking smooth tanned skin, sculpted pecs, and the tightest six-pack I've ever seen.
I can't help but snort out loud.
Me: FFS. Did u just send me a pic of your chest?!
Him: Yup. Did it work?
Me: In icking me out? Yes. Success!
Him: In changing your mind. I'm trying to butter you up here.
Me: Ew. Go butter up someone else. PS-I'm posting that pic on my-bri
I'm referring, of course, to MYBriar, our school's equivalent of Facebook, which ninety-five percent of the student body is on.
"Jesus Harold Christ! I'm not tutoring you, okay? Go bug somebody else." I point at the menu in front of him. "Are you ordering? Because if not, then please go away and let me do my job in peace."
"Jesus Harold Christ?" Garrett snickers before picking up the laminated menu and giving it a cursory glance.
So Garrett finally wears Hannah down and tells her he will help her get this dude she wants if he tutors him. He's all like, he will notice you if we go on a date together etc... so, Hannah decides to try it. And this is what she gets when she shows up for the first tutor session.
"I didn't think she was a hooker--I thought she was a stripper," the blond retorts, as if that makes it better. "She's wearing a costume, for fuck's sake."
He does have a point. My waitress uniform isn't exactly subtle.
"PS, I want a stripper for my birthday," GQ announces. "Just decided now. Get on it."
"I'll make a couple calls," Garrett promises, but the second his friend wanders off, he confides, "He's not getting a stripper. We all chipped in to get him a new iPod. He dropped his in the koi pond beind Hartford house."
When I snicker, Garrett pounces like a mountain lion. "Holy shit. Was that a laugh? I didn't think you were capable of showing amusement. Can you do it again and let me film it?"
"I laugh all the time." I pause. "Mostly at you, though."
Hannah takes a breathe. "We studied. We watched TV. I went home late. That's what happened. Got it?"
I fight back laughter. "As you wish."
"Did you really just Princess Bride me?"
"Did you really just use Princess Bride as a verb?"
See I just really love how they banter back and forth, there is so much of this in the book. At some point Hannah confesses to Garrett about her rape when she was younger. He was always on about why she wouldn't drink anything at parties and such, she made up a lie at first and said it was a friend that it happened to. She finally told him the truth and said she's fine with it, she's over it, she's had sex with two other boyfriends she's been with but she feels broken and wants him to help her.. uh.. get fixed. Let's just leave it at that. This happens after half the book so there is a lot of stuff that goes on before all of this, some crap Hannah goes through with some jerk she's supposed to be doing a musical duet with, the telling of Garrett's jerk of a dad, hockey practice, games, parties, etc. Now I have to include this excerpt of where they are trying to fix her and it all goes to hell in a hand basket when.. well just read it..
"Oh my God, are you kidding me?"
He looks startled. "What's wrong?"
"Are you taking human growth hormones or something?" I snatch my hand back, fighting another rush of nervousness. "There's no way that huge man monster is fitting inside me!"
Garrett's head abruptly drops in the crook of his arm as a shudder racks his body. At first I think he's pissed off. Or maybe even crying. It takes several seconds before I realize what's happening. He's laughing.
Scratch that-he's in hysterics.
His broad back quakes with laughter, causing the mattress to vibrate beneath us. When he finally speaks, his voice is wheezy and broken by loud guffaws. "Man monster?"
"Stop laughing at me. I'm serious." I insist. "I might have big boobs and a grabbable ass, but have you seen my hips? Tiny and narrow! Which stands to reason that my lady canal-"
A how rips out of his mouth, "Lady canal?"
"-is narrow too. You're going to rip me in half."
Needless to say nothing happened that night in that form, but it was so funny. And the thing I like about the way the author wrote this, is that Garrett is really good with her knowing that she was raped. He was very nervous and trying to do things in a way that wouldn't freak her out. Until his Man Monster arrived on the scene :-)
Here is a funny part later on when a bunch of other stuff goes down. She rushes headlong into the men's locker room. Here is a PG version of what she saw, but I love the excerpt.
The guy protests from behind. "I don't think you should go in th-"
I burst into the locker room and -
Horror slams into me as I register what I'm seeing. Oh God. I've stumbled onto a penis convention. Big penises and small penises and fat penises and penis-shaped penises. It doesn't matter which direction I move my head because everywhere I look I see penises.
My mortified gasp draws the attention of every penis-er, guy, in the room. In a heartbeat, towels snap up and hands cover junk and bodies shuffle around, while I stand in the front of the room blushing like a tomato.
I would have shit twice and died! One more excerpt and I will stop because you really need to read the book, I just wanted to point out some of the funny parts. It's not all fun and games, there are some serious things that go on in the book with different people, their families, their fears. Just read it!
Hannah jumps in surprise when Coach Jensen appears in the shower area.
"Oh, hey, Coach." I call out. "Not what it looks like."
His dark brows knit in a displeased frown. "It looks like you're taking a shower in front of your girlfriend. In my locker room.
"Okay, then yeah, it's what it looks like. But I promise, it's all very PG. Well, except for the fact that I'm naked. But don't worry, no kinky shit is going to happen." I grin at him. "I'm trying to win her back."
Coach's mouth opens, then closes, then opens again. I can't tell if he's amused or pissed or ready to wash his hands of the whole thing. Finally, he nods and opts for option number three. "Carry on."
Now that all is said and done, I want to say I wish it didn't take so long to read this book because it's really good. Like I said, there are some bleh moments and what not but I loved it. I thought it was a great read for me and I'm so glad they lived happily ever after. Well, they did at the end, I'm not sure what happens in their future.
AMAZON LINK TO THE BOOK: